How to find romance in the everyday

By Gabby Willis,
updated on Sep 1, 2021

How to find romance in the everyday

See the world around you in a new light with these tips for introducing romance into your day

Not just something connected to love and relationships, romance can be as simple as harnessing feelings of mystery, excitement, exoticism, and appreciation of the day-to-day things that make life a pleasure to experience.

Deeply connected to gratitude and self-love, harnessing the romance of the everyday can be the perfect foundation for lifting our spirits, and self-soothing when life has been a little rough. We’ve all experienced throwing open the curtains to bask in warm rays of sunshine that flood into a previously cool and dark room, and it’s time to tap into that feeling more.

Danielle Thornton-Walker, a life coach at Danielle Louise Coaching, says: “The love that we feel for anything comes from us – so if the inside of you is a soft, sunny space, it’s going to radiate from the outside too.”

Whether you find romance in the smell of fresh laundry and new books, or the rush you get when listening to your favourite song in the car with the windows down, here are five ways you can find and harness the romance of the everyday to make your own, and others’, lives better.


1. Be present in the moment

Danielle encourages you to take some time to immerse yourself into the present moment. Just like being in love, being wrapped up in a moment – as if nothing else matters – does wonders for our wellbeing.

As Danielle explains, when you tune-in to the simple things, and get real joy from them, your brain floods your body with oxytocin, serotonin, and dopamine – ‘happy’ hormones that make you feel alive and at peace.

2. Practise gratitude

Starting, and/or ending, your day with gratitude can also help you remain present and in love with the moment. Danielle says: “You can’t be practising gratitude and feel angry, or shame, or jealousy, or any of those uncomfortable feelings. Practising gratitude brings in all the joy, the love, the hope, and the optimism, and raises your emotional vibration.”

You might be grateful for the taste of your favourite food, or the soothing sound of heavy rain. You could have a bad day, but there’s always something romantic to be grateful for, somewhere. Try making a list of five things you’re grateful for in the day ahead when you wake up, and add five extra things before you go to sleep.

3. Use all of your senses

Really paying attention to sights, sounds, smells, sensations, and tastes will give you more things to find romance in.

"We’ve all experienced throwing open the curtains to bask in warm rays of sunshine, and it's time to tap into that feeling more"

This is something Karen Liebenguth, qualified life coach and accredited mindfulness teacher, believes in strongly. She says we should also engage in things we are passionate about, like really immersing ourselves in a piece of music, or finding bliss in sinking our hands into the dough when baking bread.

All of these feelings and activities contribute to making us feel relaxed, fulfilled, and alive, which in itself can be very romantic. At times, it is impossible to hear the birds sing, feel the dewy grass underfoot, and see summer blossoms in bloom without feeling in love with yourself, your surroundings, and your companions.

4. Spend time outdoors

Karen says: “Beauty can ignite awe and wonder, but that can also happen with meditation – when we sit quietly with ourselves, are connected to the body and breath, and the mind quietens down.”

Karen often meets her coaching clients outdoors, and encourages them to practise mindfulness and meditation in green or open spaces. This can help with a sense of connection to life around us, something bigger than ourselves, which is key to appreciating the romance of the everyday.

5. Make it a habit

Danielle adds that this all needs to be done regularly to appreciate the effects. Your brain likes consistency and evidence, and will start to do these things on its own once you’ve taught it to.

Pamela Rose, psychotherapist and coach, says creating a habit of appreciating the romance around you will help you fall back in love with your life, and boost your wellbeing.

Pamela says: “Try starting a new daily habit of picking one thing that day you’ve loved. It can be difficult to remember to do this at first, so leave yourself a note perhaps next to your toothbrush. And while you’re brushing your teeth, think back through the day and pick one thing you felt was perfect, just the way it was. This helps to release serotonin and fills you with peaceful calm. Your brain will start to realise how great this feels, and will encourage you to do more of this throughout the day.”

To connect with a life coach and become more present in your daily life, visit lifecoach-directory.org.uk

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