A crash wrecked my life – until I found my own way back: Tamara's story

By Tamara Selaman,
updated on Oct 24, 2020

A crash wrecked my life – until I found my own way back: Tamara's story

A serious road accident left Tamara traumatised and in deep despair. It took her 10 years to finally discover a path that helped her to heal from the inside

In 1999, at the age of 19, I was involved in a serious road accident that turned my life upside down, and created a series of life-changing events. I was thrown out of my car into a field. A section of my lower spine was crushed, but I was breathing. Two days later, I had a bone graft – titanium plates and screws inserted into my spine to help the bones fuse and re-grow.

In the five years that followed, I went from survival to instinct, as I struggled with my physical limitations and excruciating pain. There were times when the medication wore off, and I couldn’t move. Some days, it would take me hours of self-treating to be able to leave the house and manage my daily tasks.

I was a survivor on the outside, but inside I was in a space where I couldn’t function properly. Anxiety, depression, and panic attacks had now become a constant part of my existence, and I could feel myself slipping into the depths of despair. I was taking antidepressants and strong painkillers that caused side-effects, and I was totally misunderstood by those around me.

My mental wellbeing was slowly deteriorating. The trauma and negative emotions were eating me up from the inside, and I had days where I felt as though I couldn’t go on anymore. I was desperate to move out of this space.

I wasn’t offered any form of therapy, and was unaware that such help existed as it hadn’t formed part of my path prior to the car accident. I was about to discover a whole new world.

The year 2004 saw lots of change. I requested the removal of the metal supports and stopped all my medication, even though I was in immense pain. That same year, I underwent more than seven major operations, which added to my long list of symptoms. I started to build a form of relationship with my father for the first time since I was eight, and was also sexually mistreated by an individual who I thought I could trust.

Tamara with her family

Then I was declared bankrupt – by recommendation of the courts, due to the debt from the finance I had on the car involved in the car accident – and was left completely drained and traumatised physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially. I had never felt so low in my life. I felt alone. My mental agony had now reached its pinnacle.

Then one day, it dawned on me that it was up to me to reclaim my life and start living once again. I decided to replace my anger with compassion, to forgive myself, and to focus on the things that were in my control, and able to change – my health, my energy, my mindset!

I needed to heal from the inside out. This started to turn my life around, my spirits were lifted, and I was improving – not just my physical health but also my mental and emotional wellbeing.

Studying, reading books, and searching the web for alternate paths of healing, turned into my passion and way of life. The next 10 years were spent finding my way through this maze of mixed messages about health, trying and testing many forms of healing – both conventional and alternative. I used the services of more than 60 medical and alternative healing experts, but nothing helped me. Sometimes, I would even feel worse if the treatment wasn’t right for me, and released what I realise now was unspoken trauma.

I was depressed, my mind was jumbled, and my thoughts toxic. At that point, I just wanted to let go of everything and finally give up.

However, life had other plans. My symptoms improved and I started to get on track. I was in a relationship, and my business was delivering something – dancing and remedial massage therapy – that I had a real passion for. Dancing has always felt like my form of meditation and expressional healing.

I felt I had started to heal from within. My thinking became clearer, and I started responding – rather than reacting – to situations

In 2012, I gave birth to a beautiful boy, named Charlie. I now knew that my life wasn’t just about me anymore. When Charlie was 10 months, I became a single mum, and I knew I had to be OK for me and my child.

That same month, I lost my father, with whom I shared a complex, distant relationship, but had been building on. I flew to Canada to say goodbye, and introduce Charlie to him. This was a beautiful moment when he called him his grandson.

Two years later I lost my grandfather – the man I looked up to, the only man I hadn’t felt abandoned by, and who was my rock.

Slowly, I was being led into a path where cellular healing was of interest, along with diet and nutrition. I realised that everything is energy, and that blockages caused by stress, shock, trauma, and genes affect your flow and functioning – a bit like a traffic jam. I knew that my body’s energy flow needed to be corrected. I started with mitochondrial therapy, and began to work on the adrenal and limbic systems (responsible for emotions, memories, and stimulation). My mind started to clear, and my energy improved.

For the first time in years, I started to experience positive change, not just in my mental wellbeing, but also my physical and emotional health. I was activating the body’s miraculous capacity to self-heal – I felt like I was actually watering and nourishing my roots. I was excited. I stopped looking at my symptoms, and started looking at the energy system, and frequency healing that matches the body’s own language. I trained in the NES Health bioenergetic scanning system, and began seeing the unseen happening in my body – I felt I had started to heal from within. My energy levels soared, and I started responding – rather than reacting – to situations. For the first time in a long time, I felt strong.

Tamara with family

My quality of life has changed beyond belief, and I am able to better manage life’s challenges. I’m now completing training as a Total Release Experience Practitioner with TREUK, which has added to my understanding about the importance of a comprehensive healing model, releasing stress and trauma from within.

Looking back at my years of pain, depression, trauma, learning, and growth, I realise that all along, I was creating a unique, multi-dimensional 360 approach to wellbeing, albeit rather unintentionally!

So many of us have headaches, mood swings, chronic pain, or low energy, and while the standard protocol might be to take a pill, this often can reduce symptoms temporarily, but may not offer the long-term health solution you desire. This inspired me, and today I run Breathe360, teaching people how to activate your body’s own healing ability by re-energising your system naturally from the inside out, like I have my own.

While it’s a continual journey, this has turned into a daily lifestyle and extension of me, that now not only supports me, but also my little family tribe.

Rachel Coffey | BA MA NLP Mstr, says:

Tamara is very strong to have found a way through such testing times, and to build a successful career and family life. Her story illustrates though that she didn’t always realise she had the strength inside – not only to survive, but to grow and thrive.

Life can throw some pretty hard punches, and we all have times that seem too difficult to bear. Tamara reminds us, however, that life is also full of opportunity. It’s up to us to take on the responsibility to tap into the inner strength, and begin our journey on the road to happiness.

By Tamara Selaman

Tamara set up her own wellness programme, Breathe360, to help people re-energise and realise their true health potential.

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